How To Turn Your Spouse Off Pt. 3

Number 3: Stop using absolute phrases. What are absolute phrases? Words like never, always, have to,should,must and need too.

Eliminate these from your marriage vocabulary.. NOW! You’ll thank me later…

Because as stated in Pt 1 and 2 if you continue to use these phrases in your marriage o r relationship you will find yourself alone!

But Kelly, what’s the big deal about using absolute phrases?

Absolute phrases convey that the person “always” forgets to wash the dishes they “never” take out the trash they “have to” pick up the children from school or they “must” do whatever laundry list of things you expect.

As i’m writing this I can tell you,I don’t like when someone tells me what I have to do.

Yes, every marriage has expectations every spouse has expectations of the other and these expectations are fine but let’s have realistic expectations. No spouse always has to or must do anything they don’t want to do.

We need to realize that we were talking to our spouse. We want to be sure that we don’t use absolutes because they’re not true and they set us up for unrealistic expectations. They set us up for a really big disappointment.

Absolutes in our marriage was really doing more harm than good. No one does anything perfect 100% of the time, but no one is imperfect anything 100% of the time.

By keeping our language neutral we’re more likely to have a healthy marriage.Words like sometimes,most, would like it if set up an environment of appreciation,where you recognize and appreciate the good. It also gives permission for your spouse to make mistakes without killing there spirit.

So from now on let’s be conscious of using absolutes because no one is perfect.
Until Next Time,

All in Love..



2 thoughts on “How To Turn Your Spouse Off Pt. 3

  1. Great post! I have worked on not using absolutes in my marriage (and really all of my personal relationships) because I noticed that when other ppl say I always/never do something, I immediately tune out what could possibly be a valid critique because I feel it is a lie/exaggeration. I don’t want to give others a reason to ignore my concerns lol.


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